To read or not to read?

All you need is love … and, well do you need a reading at your wedding?

 

First of all, why do we need or have a reading at a wedding?

Sometimes couples want a ceremony to last a certain amount of time, maybe the couple wants to include someone special in the ceremony (a reading is a good way of doing that), maybe there is a theme to the wedding the couple want to continue through the reading, maybe the couple have a favourite poet, author that they want to acknowledge, maybe they want to include a little bit of religion in the ceremony without going overboard (or just enough to keep certain family members happy)

These are all valid /good reasons to include a reading in a ceremony.

A wedding reading can in fact be anything you like (you could ask someone to read out the instructions for how to service a lawnmower, if you liked, not sure what the guests would think, but hey it’s your wedding)

I always explain to a couple when we are compiling/planning/writing their wedding ceremony to choose a reading that has meaning to them.  Make sure it is a reflection on your beliefs, not what Great Aunty Fanny thinks you should have.

 

 

You also need to be mindful of the person you are choosing to perform the reading, somthing that is appropriate for an adult to read, may not sound that flash coming out of a pre-teen’s mouth.  Wedding readings can also be effective if two people read it, one line each style. I always have a copy of the reading myself on the wedding day, whether the reader says they will have their own copy of not, just incase, I always type it out in nice big font for the reader, makes it easier to read.  I also give that copy to the bride and groom, along with their vow cards and their licence as a keepsake of the day.  If you are reading a passage from a favourite book, then it’s a lovely idea to read straight out of the book and then write a lovely note in the book, and present the book to the couple after the ceremony, as a beautiful keepsake of the wedding day.

What can be used as a reading? A wedding reading can take many forms.  You can choose a piece of poetry, a passage from your favourite book, a quote from a movie (think “The Notebook”) the lyrics from a favourite song, a religious passage, a piece of wisdom passed down generation to generation.

There are thousands of wedding readings available in cyber-space, or you can ask your celebrant to recommend some if you want to include this element in your ceremony.  Just make sure that is resonates with you, that it touches you and has meaning for you, that its not just a time filler.

Here’s two of my favourite readings:

He’s not perfect, by Bob Marley

HE’S NOT PERFECT. YOU AREN’T EITHER, AND THE TWO OF YOU WILL NEVER BE PERFECT. BUT IF HE CAN MAKE YOU LAUGH AT LEAST ONCE, CAUSES YOU TO THINK TWICE, AND IF HE ADMITS TO BEING HUMAN AND MAKING MISTAKES, HOLD ONTO HIM AND GIVE HIM THE MOST YOU CAN. HE ISN’T GOING TO QUOTE POETRY, HE’S NOT THINKING ABOUT YOU EVERY MOMENT, BUT HE WILL GIVE YOU A PART OF HIM THAT HE KNOWS YOU COULD BREAK. DON’T HURT HIM, DON’T CHANGE HIM, AND DON’T EXPECT FOR MORE THAN HE CAN GIVE. DON’T ANALYZE. SMILE WHEN HE MAKES YOU HAPPY, YELL WHEN HE MAKES YOU MAD, AND MISS HIM WHEN HE’S NOT THERE. LOVE HARD WHEN THERE IS LOVE TO BE HAD. BECAUSE PERFECT GUYS DON’T EXIST, BUT THERE’S ALWAYS ONE GUY THAT IS PERFECT FOR YOU.

All of what I really need to know about how to live, and what to do, and how to be, I learned in Kindergarten. Wisdom was not at the top of the graduate school mountain, but there in the sandbox at nursery school.

These are the things I learned…

Share everything.

Play fair.

Don’t hit people.

Put things back where you found them.

Clean up your own mess.

Don’t take things that aren’t yours.

Say sorry when you hurt somebody.

Wash your hands before you eat.

Flush.

Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you. Give them to someone who feels sad.

Live a balanced life.

Learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day.

Take a nap every afternoon.

Be aware of wonder.

Remember the little seed in the plastic cup? The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.

Everything you need to know is in there somewhere.

And it is still true, no matter how old you are, when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.

As you can see readings don’t have to be super serious, they can be light-hearted, and they can be super cute.

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Real Life Wedding – Leah and Keirin

All you need is love … and a sneak peek at Leah and Keirin’s real life wedding.

Leah and Keirin Tutty

19/09/2015

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Meet Mr and Mrs Tutty

 

I was lucky enough to be the wedding celebrant as Leah and Keirin finally (after 19 years together) tied the knot. They were lucky enough to have their 3 children and closest friends by their sides as they exchanged their vows. You have to agree this venue is stunning, and needs absolutely no decoration. Here’s the run down on their dream day.

Bride: Leah Tutty

Groom: Keirin Tutty

Bridesmaids: Aimee and Samantha (Leah and Keirin’s daughter)

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Best Man: Ian

Groomsman: Dylan and Daniel (Leah and Keirin’s son’s)

Wedding Dress: From Watters

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Groom: Esquire Suit Hire

Bridemaid Dress: Pagani

Photographer: SVZ Photography

Hair and Make up: Arrum

Venue: Tropical Rainforest, Otago Museum

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Wedding Celebrant: Angela Port

Reception Venue: Alhambra Rugby Club

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Cake: Ka Pow Cakes

Music: Jumping Jacks, Jukebox Hire

Wedding Cars: 2 Black AP5s

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Wedding Colours: Green, Black and White

Ceremony music: “Nothing else matters” Metallica, “Signed, sealed, delivered”  “Ho Hey” Lumineers

Best part of the day: Just hearing the music start, and the moments after the ceremony when we felt relaxed and happy.

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Things I would have done differently: We had a small wedding, only 50 people, it was so hard choosing the guest list, if I could I would have added to the guest list.

Where did you get ideas/inspiration: OffBeat Bride site, Pinterest and just surfing the net.

How did you pick your bridal party: We picked out children and closest friends to be by our sides on the day.

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Best piece of advice you were given: From Grandma “Just do what makes you happy, bugger everyone else”

Advice to other brides: Make sure you have lots of reliable helpers to do the running around and any last minute things, so you don’t stress out on the day. Also make sure you eat, it’s a really long day!

Anything didn’t go to plan: We were late all day, hair and make-up, photos everything.

Thanks for sharing your special day Leah and Keirin, it was an absolute honour to play a small part in your big day.

 

 

 

Brides wedding day time line

All you need is love and … a good wedding day time line.

 

 

Many a bride has been stressed out trying to figure out how to fit everything into the wedding day morning, and many a bride has been a tad later than she may have wanted to  be to the ceremony because of unexpected things cropping up, and everything taking longer than you expected.

Here’s a rough guideline for a bride and her girls to follow on D Day.  It may look extreme in terms of how much time has been allocated and the time things need to kick off, but it gives you some down time. And in my personal opinion isn’t it better to have time to sit around and hang with the girls than be rushing and stressing and getting flustered. This time line is based on a 3pm kick off.

9.00am – Sleep in, enjoy the time in bed, relaxing before the chaos of the day. Have breakfast, remember you’re going to need fuel to get through the day.  Make sure you keep your fluids up too (and I don’t mean champers!) it’s going to be a long day.

 

9.30am – Shower and wash your hair (although you may want to check with your hairdresser first, sometimes slightly unclean hair is better for up do’s than clean hair). Put on a button down shirt, or a dressing gown, something you’re not going to have to lift over your head later when you get dressed.

10.30am – Hairdresser arrives.  You may want to start by getting your hair down first, that way if it takes longer than expected, the hairdresser won’t be rushing with your hair at the last moment.

11.30am – Make up starts. You may want to decide whether you want yours done first or last (to make it last longer). My opinion is to get the bride’s done first, that way you know you and/or your make up artist isn’t rushing.

12.30pm -Photographer arrives at the grooms to take photo’s of the groom and the boys getting ready.

1pm – Photographer arrives for shots of bride and her girls getting ready. They will want to take shots of the bride by herself, but also shots of the dress, shoes etc.

2pm – Mother of the bride leaves for the venue. Groom and the boys leave for the venue.

2.30pm – Bride leaves with her girls and her dad.  This leaves time for photo’s of the bride arriving at the venue.

3pm – It’s wedding time.

 

This is a brief run down, you may want to ask your hairdresser/make-up artist and photographer what they think about the timing.  You want to make sure you have more time than you think you’re going to need, in my experience everything will take longer than you think it will.  Nothing is going to ruin your day more than being stressed out about running out of time, and keeping people waiting.