All you need is love and … advice on writing your wedding vows
Legally in New Zealand a wedding ceremony only has to have one part to satisfy the ‘powers that be’ and that is the ‘I do’ piece. Everything else if totally up to you, so you can perform an interpretative dance if you feel the need ( I quite often offer that option to people, but usually they so no, not sure why) I generally structure a wedding with welcome, love story, vows, I Do’s, ring exchange, husband and wife, kiss, party!
Your wedding vows are very personal, it is the part of the ceremony where you are speaking directly to your beloved, not the guests. I describe it as the part where you share your gratitude to the other person and your promises for your shared life ahead. They can be tricky and most people struggle with them, use your celebrant to give you some pointers, and to proof read them before you commit to them.
Things to consider when writing your vows:
- Decide on the tone of the vows – are you going to write them together, or separately? Are you going to keep them secret for the big day? Are they going to be funny or totally serious? Are they going to be the same or totally different?
- Read as much inspiration as you can get your hands on – the good thing about Uncle Google is that there are wedding vows all over the place. Spend some time having a look on-line and making a note of what you like.
- Think about the future – how will your vows sound 10,20.30 years from now?
- Pinterest – it will be your best friend in this situation, tons of inspiration there.
- Questions to ask yourself – Why are we getting married? Where do I see myself in 10, 20 years from now? How does your partner inspire you? What do you miss about them when they’re not around? What surprised you about them? What have they taught you? What challenges have you met together? What did you think when you first saw them?
- Don’t leave it too late – Yes you think you’ve got tons of time, but it will run out pretty quickly when planning a wedding. Don’t leave it till the last minute and be doing it the night before.
- Vows are just for you and your partner – sure everyone is going to hear them, but remember that you are speaking directly to your loved one.
- Vows should sound like you. There is no point copying someone else’s long love poem if that is not really you. Your partner will appreciate it more if it comes from your heart and sounds like you.
Remember it’s your wedding day so do it your way.