12 most overlooked elements of a wedding day

Planning a wedding is bloody stressful, you’ve got every one giving you their opinions on what you ‘should’ do/have/wear/eat etc that it can all be very overwhelming. Usually planning starts witht the big things, venue/food/photographer/CELEBRANT and once those are booked in then we start thinking of all the little detail things.

I’ve comprised a list of some of the most overlooked elements of a wedding day to help you out.

  • Plan B – ‘yeah we don’t need a wet weather option, it’ll be fine!’ famous last words, always a great idea to have a Plan B option, incase of the weather not getting the email about sunshine on the wedding day. There is literally nothing worse than your guests being frozen and wet, because it’s raining, and you don’t have anywhere else to go for your ceremony. It will be memorable, but not for the right reasons.
  • Where the sun will set and when – always good to know what direction the sun will be, for your ceremony (so no ones squinting in the photos) and where do you want your guests to stand and where will you and your attendants stand. If you know what time the sun is setting you can schedule your day accordingly, maybe sneak away from your reception for beautiful sunset shot.
  • Transport for the bridal party home – Yip, your attendants will probably arrive at the ceremony space together, maybe in a fancy car or limo, but how are they getting home? Especially the married couple. Make sure you have someone who can drive you to where you’re going to be staying the wedding night.
  • Music during drinks/nibbles – if you don’t have a band/singer/dj then it’s a great idea to organise a speaker and playlist for while your guests are having drinks and nibbles and chatting after the ceremony before dinner, because once the ceremony music finishes it can be weird to not have something playing in the background.
  • Overnight bag – I have heard of many a bride waking up the morning after the wedding and not having anything else to change into to go home, and having to scamper out of the flash hotel, still in their wedding dress. Make sure you have a bag packed with a change of clothes and your toileties for going home the next day, and leave it in the car (if you’re taking the same car after the ceremony) or someone that you can grab before you leave the reception.
  • Eat and drink before the ceremony – I know the morning of the wedding can feel like a blur. There’s hair and makeup and dresses and little people and mothers to wrangle and it can seem like you’ve got all the time in the world, and then suddendly you’re putting on the dress and heading out the door, and wondering why you have a stinking headache and feeling faint. Organise someone to grab some food, or better yet, get it delivered, for you all during the morning and keep up the water intake, to ensure you get through the day feeling good.
  • Who’s in charge of the wishing well, and the gifts? It’s a great idea to give someone the job of keeping an eye on the wishing well, and the gift table, and removing it to somewhere safe during the ceremony, away from temptation.
  • Comfy shoes – Yes those heels look killer, but are your feet going to thank you after a couple of hours on the dance floor? Have someone pack you a pair of slip on’s or jandals or converse, that you can slip on to give your feet a break.
  • Factor yourselves into the guest count – It’s easy to go through the guest list and rattle off the count for caterers etc and forget yourselves or your bridal party.
  • Eat – during the day, you’re going to be catching up with all the people. You’ll be laughing, drinking, talking, hugging and dancing, make sure you sit down and eat too.
  • Keyholder – If you’re dIYing your wedding, and holding it in a hall etc, who is going to be there to open up for the guests before the ceremony, and who is going to be responsible for locking the doors up at the end of the night?
  • Take it all in – Take a 10 minute breather with your honey at some point during the night to check in, and connect and share your memories of the day. It will go so fast that it will be over before you know it.

Don’t forget to enjoy it!

Banish the word should from wedding planning

The word “should” it’s quite a small word, quite simple, but it has the power to make you reassess your ideas about what you and your partner want your wedding day to look and feel like.

It has the power to create arguments and resentment between you and your family and/or bridal party.

It has the power to make you spend way more money than you actually need and/or want to.

It has the power to make you feel like you’re not good enough, or your wedding isn’t going to be good enough.

So let’s remove the word ‘should’ and give yourself the freedom to use the word ‘could’ instead!

How to be the most awesome wedding guest ever.

How to be the most awesome wedding guest ever!

To be invited to a wedding is an absolute honour and privilege, it is absolutely not a give in, just because you’re the bride’s best friend’s mother’s brother, and it should be treated as such!
There are some things that will make you the absolute best wedding guest ever!
*Never assume you will be invited (and don’t hassle the bride) there are so many factors that go into planning a wedding (budget, venue, location) that not everyone will be invited.
*Always RSVP, this is one of the hardest parts of planning a wedding, co-ordinating the RSVP’s, so make the brides day by yes’ing or no’ing as soon as you can.
*Don’t ask to bring a plus one, if it hasn’t been stipulated on the invitation for you to bring one.
*Adhere to the dress code – there are only two occasions in life where dressing up is required, weddings and funerals, so honour the occasion, by leaving the tracksuits and crocs at home and donning a suit or appropriate dress.
*Arrive on time – don’t make the bride wait because you’re late, don’t be the person creeping in at the back late. If you’re not sure where you’re going beforehand, google it and download the map!
*Don’t take photos, especially if you’re told by the celebrant etc not to. Some occasions in life don’t need to be seen through the lens of a phone or ipad!
*Don’t think that you’re the funniest person alive by mentioning to the groom when he’s waiting for the bride “it’s not too late to run” it is possibly the most disrespectful thing to say at the wedding.
*Don’t get stinking drunk and hit on every one with a pulse.
*Dont spend the whole wedding reception on your phone, not engaging with the other guests.
Be excited to be in a space where love is honoured and act accordingly.

Eenie Meenie Miney Mo, How to choose your celebrant.

All you need is love and … a great celebrant

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Photo by the talented Kerry Hodge Photography

Congratulations, you’re engaged.  Yay!!

“Let the adventure of planning your wedding begin!”

If you’re planning on getting married anywhere that isn’t a operational church (a church that only allows priests etc from that church to marry people) then you are going to need a registered wedding celebrant.

Like everything else wedding related there are a million different choices, which is a good thing, generally speaking. But where do you start? 

  • Other vendors – If you’ve already booked a venue, or photographer, or florist, or make up artist then ask them. They would have seen/done enough weddings to have a general idea on who they like. They have often seen way more than one celebrant, and a venue and/or photographer would have been present while a celebrant has lead a wedding previously.
  • Facebook – The internet is a great place and can bring the whole world to your computer. There are numerous private wedding groups on Facebook, and they are a great place to ask for recommendations, and you will get honest feedback. Facebook is also a great place to stalk some of the celebrants you have heard about, most celebrants these days will have a professional Facebook page, and looking at this will give you an idea of the style of a celebrant, and if they have photos of previous weddings, you’ll get to see them in action. A good Facebook page will probably also have reviews, so take a look at these too, find out about what couples have said about them.
  • Friends/Relatives etc – Ask around your friends, rellies, work mates and get recommendations from who they may have used, or celebrants they may have seen at weddings they have attended.
  • Wedding shows – Check out your local wedding show, they always have a few of each vendor, and that way you get to have a chat, ask any questions, and maybe organise a time to meet up and talk in more depth.
  • Uncle Google – Just type in “Celebrants in Dunedin” and you’ll get pages of info, from there you can check out their website (if they have one) and any social media they may have.
  • Celebrants Association– The Celebrants Assocation is a voluntary association for Celebrants in New Zealand. Belonging to the Celebrants Association means that a celebrant is governed by a code of conduct, and has access to on-going education. The website is pretty easy to use, just type in your area, and it will come back with all the celebrants in your area that are members of the Celebrants Association.

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Photo by Kerry Hodge Photography

So, once you’ve have a look and seen one or more that you like the look of, then contact them to see if they are available for your wedding date. Good celebrants can be booked a year or more in advance, so it’s best to get in early. If they are available on your date, then it’s a great idea to organise a meeting (either at a cafe/pub/your home or theirs, or if you are out of the area or country then Skype) I always offer a non-obligational first meeting, it gives you a chance to have a look at some of my work, chat about my style and what you have planned and your ideas for your day.

It’s a good idea to meet with more than one celebrant, you’ll learn a bit more about what you’re looking for, don’t worry we won’t be offended if you do, we want you to get the right fit for your ceremony too. Feel free to ask a lot of questions, it will make you feel more comfortable with your choice. Make sure that once you have made a decision on which celebrant you would like to book, that you contact the other one to let them know you are going with someone else.

I know weddings can be mega expensive, and I know it can be all about making that dollar stretch as far as it can go. But there are certain elements to a wedding day that you really don’t want to skimp on and I believe a celebrant is one of those things. I know there are also a lot of different price points for celebrants, but don’t just go with the cheapest. Make sure you do your research and find out what you are getting for your money. There is a common mis-conception that a celebrant just turns up on the day, says a few words and then leaves, and then pocket a bucket full of cash to do so. A good celebrant will want to build a relationship with you, to ensure that you have a ceremony that is heartfelt, but is also a reflection of your personality and your love story. A good celebrant will meet with you at least on two different occasions, write you a ceremony from scratch, that is personalised to you and your love (there is no cut and paste), they will be there to answer all your questions/texts/emails/phone calls, provide you with inspiration to write your own vows (if that is what you choose) they will offer suggestions for different elements you may like to include in your ceremony (readings, ring warming etc) they will facilitate a wedding rehearsal, to ensure everyone knows what is going on, when and how, they will be there early to liaise with your other vendors (photographer/video/venue) to ensure everyone is on the same page, and that the ceremony runs smoothly. They may run your music for the ceremony (creating a personalised playlist for you) and have their own PA system, and microphone.

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Your celebrant should make you feel excited about the wedding, they should inspire you with suggestions, they should empower you to make the ceremony and day about what you want, they should be organised, and calm and relaxed on the day. They should be the person who sets the scene for the entire day.

 I believe a celebrant should have a passion for the job they do, it should show in their eyes, that they love being a celebrant, otherwise it will reflect in a lacklustre wedding ceremony, lacking in personalisation, warmth and professionalism.

 

Including your fur-baby in your wedding

All you need is love and … how to include your fur baby in your wedding.

 

Many couples have pets together before they get married, and a lot of couples consider their pets as their fur babies and so want to include them in their wedding, naturally. So here’s a round up of ways to include you pets in your special day.

Use your pet to propose – How super cute is it to include your pet in your proposal? You could tie the ring on their collar, and then tell your partner that you have a new collar for the pet. Instant brownie points. You could also have a sign made to go around the pets neck with “will you marry my dad” on it.

Save the dates – Use your pet to announce to your guests your wedding date.

Engagement photos – Include your pet in your engagement photo shoot.

Wedding photos – If you’re not sure about your pet coming to the ceremony or reception then ask someone to bring them along for the wedding photos. Brides all dressed up with their pets make magic photos.

Flower Girl Escort – Let your flower girl escort your pet down the aisle.

Pet instead of bouquet – Carry your pet down the aisle instead of a bouquet. Obviously dependant on the type and size of pet. But a rabbit or kitten would look super cute in a flower adorned basket.

Have them by your side during your ceremony – If your pet is the sit still and not move type of animal, and would no be phased by all the attention and people around, it would make for an adorable photo.

Include them in your vows – I have included many a mention of a pet in a wedding ceremony. You could include them in your vows “I promise to love you as much as Oscar (the dog)”

Dress them up – there are a few ways you can dress up your pet for the big day, without hindering it’s movement, or dignity. Try a cute bandana around it’s neck for something understated.

Cake topper – Order a customised cake topper which includes a nod to your fur baby as well.

Table numbers – Incorporate photos of your pet as your table numbers, that way everyone gets to see your pet.

Cardboard cut out – Have a life size cardboard cut out of your pet made, that could be displayed at your reception, or used as a prop in a photo booth.  It would be just like they were there.

There are a few things you may need to consider when deciding if your pet is going to be a part of your big day. How are their socialisation skills? If you have time to get them training, then that would be wise, if they are the type of pet who will wander in and then fall asleep at someones feet, then they are the perfect candidate.  If they have not yet been trained and bark at everything that moves then it’s probably not a good idea.

Take your pet to the venue well before the big day, so they get comfortable and familiar with the place. And make sure that your pet is allowed at the venue.

Make sure there is adequate food and water available for the pet during the day.

Let your guests know before the day that your pet will be attending, that way if they are allergic to animals they can take precautions before hand.

Ensure you have a pet wrangler available on the day, who isn’t yourself or your partner. I recommend someone who the pet knows and is quite happy to look after your pet during the day.

Pets are very special members of the family, so of course they should be included in your wedding day.

How to include your children in your wedding ceremony.

All you need is love and … a way to include your children in your wedding ceremony.

As a celebrant, I find a large percentage of the couples I marry already have children, either together or they are blending two families when they marry.  Most couples want a way to include or at the very least acknowledge their children in their wedding ceremony.  Here’s a list of some of the different ways you can do this.

Bridesmaids or groomsman – you can include your children, depending on their age as a bridesmaid or groomsman/best man.  This type of role is best suited to a child who understands what’s going on, and can stand still long enough.

Unity ceremony – the whole idea behind a unity ceremony is the joining together of (usually two) people, but it’s an awesome way to incorporate your children into the ceremony. You could preform a sand ceremony (where you pour different coloured sands into a vessel) or a candle ceremony ( where you each light a central candle with a smaller candle)

Write children into vows – Use the platform of your vows to include a mention to your children. I like to use the I Do’s part and write a portion about supporting the other person to be the best mum/dad to your child. It’s a very effective way to make a small acknowledgement of the children if that’s what you’re going for.

Walk down the aisle – You can have your children walk down the aisle with you. If your children are older they could actually do the ‘giving away’ part, or if they are smaller they could just walk hand in hand with you.

Reading or poem – Depending on the child’s age and confidence level, you could ask them to perform a reading or poem, or ask them to write a poem themselves to read out at the wedding.

Flower girl/Ring bearer – Little people are super cute as flower girls or ring bearers.

Vows – There are numerous examples of children saying vows as well as the couple. Again the decision should be based on age, and their understanding of the wedding process.  It could be as simple as a question and the child simply saying “I Do” or in the case of a blended family, the step parent saying vows or promises to the child.

Picking the ring, or helping plan the proposal – Depending on the age of the child, you could include them in the picking of the engagement ring, or involve them in the planning and execution of the proposal.  Just make sure they can keep a secret.

Invite them to join the first dance – Ask your children to join you a little bit after the first dance starts, super cute.

Sign the marriage certificate – Your children can sign the marriage certificate, as long as they understand entirely what they are signing.  If you don’t think they are quite age appropriate to do that, you can ask your celebrant to produce a family certificate (not legal) and all sign that on the day as well.

Hand fasting ritual – Include your children in a hand-fasting ritual, as part of the ceremony.

Exchange gifts with children – You can exchange rings with your children as well as your husband/wife or another piece of jewellery altogether, maybe a necklace or pendant or a signet ring.  I do know of a couple who had 4 rings made, and the children’s rings fit into adults rings, very cool.

Handing out ceremony booklets – Use children to hand out ceremony booklets or bubbles or confetti to guests before the ceremony starts, and usher people to their seats.

Play music – If your child is a talented musician, ask them to showcase their musical abilities before the ceremony begins.

Getaway car – Ask them to help decorate the getaway car, you know the deal, tin cans, streamers, ‘just married’ sign.

Photographer in training – Give them a cheap camera, with a strap for added security, and ask them to take photos after the ceremony and during the reception.  You’ll be amazed at the shots you’ll get, and you’ll see the celebration from their point of view.

Just remember to think about the age of the child, what are they going to be able to handle on the day? What type of personality do they have, are the super confident or very shy? Are they liable to say something inappropriate at the wrong time? Also think about to what extent you want to include your children.  Some couples just want a small mention of their children in the ceremony, and the rest focused on them as a couple committing, while others want to include the children saying vows to the family unit as well. Your celebrant should be able to point you in the right direction, and give you lots of options.

Remember as always that it is your day, and to do it your way.

 

 

The most over-looked part of wedding planning.

All you need is love and … a great wedding ceremony.

“It doesn’t really matter” “Don’t make it too long, I don’t want the guests to get bored” “It’s not the most important part of the day” “Just make it short, so we can start drinking”

All statements I’ve heard or seen when talking about planning the actual wedding ceremony. Which kind of breaks my heart a little bit every time.  Now I’ve said this before, and, I may be slightly biased based on the fact that I’m a celebrant and am lucky enough to help couples on their wedding planning journey. But time and time again I hear about people who have the entire wedding planned out, either in real life or on Pinterest, but have not had a single thought about the actual ceremony.  And to a degree I get that. Often when I meet couples we establish that they are in the camp of “we’ve never done this before and we don’t know what we’re doing” and that’s cool, because that is where a awesome celebrant will hold your hand (figuratively, not actually, well maybe if you’re really nervous) and explain the options and the process and the importance of your wedding ceremony.

Your wedding ceremony should set the tone for your entire wedding day. It is in fact the party starter.  Way back in the day, wedding ceremonies had to follow a certain script, and they were all pretty much the same.  You said exactly what the officiant wrote for you. I can imagine that not a lot of brides and grooms can even remember what they said to each other. But times have changed, big time. Couples have so much more say in what they want to include as part of their ceremony, and I for one am excited about this.  There are so many different ways you can structure your ceremony, and so many different elements you can include. It definitely gives a couple more control and choice to help their celebrant create their perfect ceremony. If you are serious and believe that a wedding should be a restrained and solemn occasion and want a ceremony that reflects that, then great, you can absolutely have that, and you need to choose a celebrant who can deliver that. If the two of you have any interesting, quirky or fun elements to your relationship then I believe it is your responsibility and right to roll in that direction.  A ceremony should reflect your different personalities and your relationship together. I believe if you do not have a ceremony that reflects you two together then you are doing a dis-service to your guests, and to yourselves.  You do not want your guests to walk away from your ceremony thinking “what on earth was that. I don’t even know who the celebrant was talking about!” So in saying that no two wedding ceremonies should be the same, (except for the legal parts that have to be done) and if your celebrant is just going to ‘cut and paste’ your ceremony then find another celebrant.  You, your guests and your love deserve a personalised and original wedding ceremony.

Yes I understand the wedding ceremony, can be uncomfortable, and for most people it is the most nerve-wracking part of the day. Of course it’s not everyday that you share a piece of your heart with your loved one and your friends and family. And I know that public speaking is not every-ones cup of tea.  But in saying that how many times in your life will you be able to make such a grand gesture and acknowledge all the reasons you love  your partner and share your promises for the future, to them, and your friends and family?  I believe it’s an extremely memorable and emotional act of love, and should be treated as such.

Yes wedding planning can be fun. It can be so exciting to choose the dress and the colours, and the table decorations and share the experience with your girlfriends or your mum.  I also know for some people (mainly brides) it can become all consuming.  It can literally take over your life.  It is also really easy for a couple to lose sight of what the day is really about.  It is about celebrating your love story.

When you are getting married you are committing to your loved one  for the rest of your lives.  You are making declarations to each other in front of your family and friends that you will love each other, despite the fact that she wears leopard print a little too much, and he always leaves his shoes in the middle of the doorway. You are becoming a team, where you know the other person will always have your back.  And if that is not worth focusing on and totally celebrating then I don’t know what is!

 

Some Lovely Things

All you need is love and … some lovely things.

A curated list of things, people and places I’ve discovered this week that I love.

Bridal Headpieces

I have been lusting over  these gorgeous bridal headpieces all week.  If you want something a little bit different from the traditional veil option for your wedding headwear then these pieces totally fit the bill.  ‘Shut the front door’ create these completely original bridal headpieces and other beautiful headpieces for other events.They are truly stunning, and would add that ‘wow’ factor to your wedding day outfit.  Check out www.shutthefrontdoor.com.au for more beautifulness.

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The stunning Aurora Wings piece.

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The Bijou piece

The Penguin and the Stone

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Look, they even look like they’re holding hands.

I was reminded of this cute story during the  week, by a friend of mine.

After a long winter, the Adelie penguins make their way to their mating grounds throughout the area of coastal Antarctica. The male and female penguins strut and bray, a little bit like the guys at the pub on a Friday night, hoping to attract the attention of another Adelie penguin. When a special (read: attractive) penguin catches their eye, the Adelie penguin presents the other penguin with a stone. If the penguin accepts the stone, they start a bond for life. Each new spring, the courtship continues, the couples find each other again; and again, a new stone is presented as a token of affection. The penguin pair continues to gather stones for their nest, looking for each precious stone in the frozen ground.  I’m not 100% sure if this is true or a urban myth, but I love the cute story anyway.

Wedding Planning Mini Milestone Champagne Labels

Wedding Planning can be tough, and long, and stressful and expensive. So it’s important to take breaks and celebrate the mini milestones that you tick off on the wedding planning checklist and celebrate with your fiance or the girls, and Studio B Label Co have the perfect way for you to do this.

“Studio B Label Co make wedding planning even more fun with their custom Engagement Milestone Mini Champagne labels! The bride can celebrate every stage of her engagement and wedding planning with a mini bottle of bubbly! Perfectly sized to fit mini split champagne bottles, this label is personalized with the bride’s name.  Done in a bridal white label with black and hot pink text (customisable), each label is printed on weatherproof stock.  Just peel and stick!”  As you can see from the two photos below there are a few different options for the stickers, but how cute and fun are they?

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Ideas We Love: Flower Girl Inspo

All you need is love and … a cute flower girl.

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Photo via: weddbook.com

Flower girls are cute, we all know that. Choosing  to include a flower girl  is a great way to include either your own daughter, family member or some-one who is close to you’s child. And of course you don’t have to have a flower girl or girls (as is sometimes the case) especially if you are budget conscious, as adding extra people into the bridal party, makes for extra cost.

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Photo via: youtube

There are a few things you are going to want to think over before choosing your  flower girl.

  • Age – yes, babies look delicious all dressed up, and definitely get a cute factor dialled up when they come down the aisle, but generally they can’t walk, so will need someone to hold them, do you have that someone? and will said child behave itself during the ceremony, and do you have an exit strategy for if they don’t?
  • Practice – little people need to have a rehearsal! They need to know where they are going to walk from and then to, and then where are they going to stand after they do the walking from and to, will they go to grandma, or mum or dad, and where will that person be seated? It is very very common for little people to freak out when they realise everyone is looking at them, so have a strategy for what to do if that happens, perhaps they could walk with a bridesmaid.

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Photo via: weddingelation.com

  • Combo – little people do better if they have a partner, either the ring bearer or another flower girl, it will help them feel less nervous, so feel free to combo them up.
  • Processional – I always place the ring bearer and flower girl after the bridesmaids, and just before the bride (they are essentially sprinkling those rose petals for the bride to walk upon, not the bridesmaids) and this also helps because then they know where they are walking to, because the bridesmaids are already in place. Tip – always leave a bigger gap between the flower girls and the bride, everyone will be ‘ohhhing and aahhing’ over the cuties, and totally miss the bride’s entrance.

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Photo via: blissbysam.com

  • Getting ready – will they get ready with the ‘big girls’ and arrive in the car with them or are they just going to arrive at the venue before the wedding with their parents/grandparents. Leave them getting dressed to the absolute last minute, just before your walk out the door, to save the dress from getting dirty. And don’t forget to factor in things like car-seats.
  • Reception – it is totally acceptable to have the flower girls/ring bearer at the wedding ceremony, and then not include them for the reception, if you are not having children at your wedding, and it gives the parents the night off too.

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Photo via: weddbook.com

  • Importance – make sure the little one knows how important her role is, and where she fits in with the bridesmaids, and how she has to behave.
  • Your own daughter – if you are using your own daughter be prepared to her not to want to sit in her seat, she may even want to wander off and have a look around. Know that she may want to stand with you, especially in between the two of you! In most cases it is just a case of ‘go with it’ it is your child after all, and who is going to have an issue with that. I have done many a wedding with either the bride or groom, having to hold onto their little flower girl. No drama.

And of course your flower girl does not have to be a little girl.

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Photo via: Ashley Elizabeth Photography

 

People We Love: Angela Port – Celebrant

All you need is love and … some wisdom from a wedding professional.

Now, I know a lot about weddings, but not everything, so “People We Love”is a series of interviews with wedding professionals, who will share their stories and wedding wisdom.

Meet: Angela Port – celebrant

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Business Name: Angela Port Weddings

Tell us a bit about yourself and your business: I became a celebrant a little over 3 years ago. I was asked by my good friends to MC their wedding, and after one too many wines I agreed. I worked really hard when preparing for the role on writing a funny and  personal script to deliver at the wedding.  When I looked back on the experience (yes, it was quite a way out of my comfort zone) but I realised how much I actually enjoyed it, and wondered how I could do more of it. And so I applied to become a celebrant.

I am a wife, and mother, and have another part time job, so I juggle all that with providing my couples an awesome wedding ceremony.

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Leah and Keirin

What do you love about your job? I love the fact that every couple has a unique love story to tell and it is my job to tell that story. I love that a wedding ceremony only has a small part that legally has to be done, and the rest is completely up to you, so you can absolutely stamp your own personality on it. I love that everyone is always happy on a wedding day (also slightly nervous, usually) and there are not many jobs that I know of where that is the case. I love the moment after the ceremony, where I congratulate the couple and you can see the look of relief on their faces, because the hardest part of the day is over, and they say to me “wow! that was easy” To me that means I’ve done a good job.

What do you do in your spare time, hobbies/interests? I am a wedding junkie, so usually spare time is spent researching wedding related topics on line.  My website keeps my pretty busy. I love walking, especially on the beach, and hanging with my family.

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My own wedding day, 17 July 1999

What one thing do you wish every wedding couple knew? The day is about YOU, I know you do know it, but you can absolutely lose focus so easily once every one else puts their 5 cents in. Weddings and funerals, can sometimes bring out the worst in people. Just remember that the wedding is about you and your loved one committing to each other, not what Great Aunty Fanny wants (no offence intended to Great Aunty Fanny)

Any wedding trends you love or would love to see disappear?  I love it when a couple think outside of the box, and make the day reflect their own individual personalities.  Not a fan of the white pouffy dress? Wear colour or a beautiful tailored jumpsuit! Want your Mum to sing you down the aisle? Go for it! There are so many different ways to do things, and no particular way is correct.  So just go with what feels right to you and your partner.

A&J-281ablog
Amber and Jeff

Any great/interesting stories about working with a couple? One of the first weddings I performed, when I asked them about exchanging rings (in our planning session) they told me that she had a ring, but he couldn’t wear one because of his job, so he got a new socket set instead of a ring! They had one of the socket thingys engraved with their wedding date.  The wedding was at Moeraki and there was only 5 of us there, and the bride and groom both wore jeans, and afterwards they headed to Fleurs for lunch. It was super relaxed. I love it when a couple get married their way.

What two pieces of advice would you give a couple planning their wedding? Be realistic about what you can afford, your wedding will not be less than because you can’t afford fancy wedding favours. Remember what the wedding is about, (hint: it’s about you committing to your loved one) people spend so much time and energy focusing on the finer details, and wanting to impress their guests, that they don’t actually think about what they are going to say to their partner during the ceremony (which I know I may be biased, considering my job)  but I think that is the most important.

One insider tip/trick to pass on? If you think you are going to cry and don’t want to, press your tongue to the roof of your mouth. I’m not sure why it works, but it does. And who cares if you cry, it’s a wedding!