Tag: relationship

Date Nights

Published on by angelaportLeave a comment

All you need is love and … date nights.

So you’re in the throes of wedding planning, it’s stressful, time consuming, expensive, he’s not agreeing with you, Great Aunty Fanny is trying to tell you what to do! You’re getting a bit overwhelmed, you have a job, maybe some kids, a mortgage and a wedding to plan, aaaargggh!

It’s time to remember who you’re planning to marry and why!

It’s time for a date night.

Date nights are a great way to re-connect with each other, and remember that you guys had fun together, before the wedding planning and the kids, and Great Aunty Fanny. And the good news is they don’t have to be expensive, (which is awesome if you’re saving manically for a wedding) it is after all about just spending time together. You don’t even have to leave the house (which is great if you don’t have a babysitter for the little people) And while a dinner and movie, is cool, if that’s what floats your boat, there’s heaps of other ideas for some different date nights.

Here’s a list of ideas

  • Learn to dance together – you could include this as part of your wedding planning, but learning a dance for your first dance, or try something completely different, hip hop any-one?
  • Night classes – great opportunity to learn a new skill/language together.
  • Walk – just go for a stroll around your neighbour-hood, it’s free!
  • Go out for dessert/coffee – a way less cheaper option than a full meal.
  • Cook a new meal/dish together – choose an interesting/new/yummy sounding meal off the internet, or a magazine/cookbook. And prepare the meal together, put on some music, pour a glass of something nice, and enjoy each other’s company. Bonus is you actually have a meal to share together at the end of it.

 

  • Do something touristy – is there something in your town/city that all the tourists visit, but you’ve never been, check it out.
  • Head out of town – just jump in the car and drive, stop along the way for fish n chips or an ice-cream.
  • Picnic – prepare a picnic and head to a local beach or park.
  • Coffee and a walk on the beach – grab a takeaway coffee and head to the beach for a stroll.
  • Board game at home – dust off the old monopoly game (or whatever game takes your fancy), even a card game. Grab some snacks, a bottle of something and enjoy the game.
  • Visit the local pet shop or SPCA – take some time to play with the animals.
  • Pot luck dinner – organise a pot-luck dinner, that way you don’t have to do all the work, and it’s cheaper and have a adult dinner with adult conversation.
  • Star gaze together – super cheap and super romantic. Lay a blanket on the ground and gaze at the sky. Of course there’s an app for making sure you actually know what you are looking at (Nightsky)
  • Surprise – One of the couple is in charge of organising the date night.
  • Share items on your bucket list – it may inspire future date nights.
  • Brunch – Brunch may be easier to wrangle a babysitter for, and will generally be cheaper than a dinner out.
  • Karaoke – You either love it or hate it. If you love it hit the local karaoke club and sing a duet together.
  • Hire a kayak – Take a trip around your local harbour together. You can usually hire kayaks by the hour reasonably cheaply.
  • Quiz night – Check out your local bar for when their local quiz night is. Form a team with others and be amazed at the obscure general knowledge your partner has.

 

In the midst of wedding planning, or just life in general, it’s so easy to get caught up in just getting through the day. It is so easy to unintentionally disconnect from each other. We live in a society where FOMO (fear of missing out) means a lot of us are glued to our phones/laptops and not paying attention to the person sitting on the other end of the couch.

How well do you know each other?

Published on by angelaportLeave a comment

All you need is love and … a cute/fun (I can’t stress the fun bit enough!!) quiz.

 

I saw this cute little questionnaire on social media a few weeks back, and I thought it would make a great post. So ask your partner these questions and record the answers. It’s supposed to be fun, so don’t punish the other person if they can’t answer the questions or you think their answers are wrong. And I take no responsibility for any arguments that may or may not happen as a result of any answers to  this quiz 🙂

Who knows you may learn something new about how your partner sees you!

 

1 What is something I always say to you?

2 What makes me happy?

3 What makes me sad?

4 What was I like as a child?

5 How tall am I?

6 What is my favourite thing to do?

7 What do I do when you’re not there?

8 What am I good at?

9 What am I not very good at?

10 If I became famous what would it be for?

11 What do I do as a job?

12 What makes you proud of me?

13 What is my favourite food?

14 What do you and I do together?

15 How are you and I the same?

16 If I was a cartoon character who would I be?

17 How are you and I different?

18 How do you know I love you?

19 Where is my favourite place to do?

20 How old was I when you met me?

Feel free to let me know how you got on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

View from the front.

Published on by angelaportLeave a comment

All you need is love and … what the celebrant sees.

As a marriage celebrant I’ve been lucky enough to be a part of many weddings, and it is always an absolute honour and privilege to be present and to guide a couple into married life.  All the weddings have of course been different, some have been big affairs with hundreds of guests in castles, and some have been very intimate, with only a few guests, on the beach.  One of the things they all have in common is the feeling of love and happiness that hangs in the air and surrounds the couple, it’s quite magical to witness.

Lately I have  been open and aware to experiencing and noticing the different ‘looks’ that you always see at a wedding, whether it’s big, small, on the beach or in a church.

received_10200792163644545
Leah and Keirin pic by SVZ photography

Look 1 – This is the look that is exchanged between the groom and a flower girl and or ringbearer, especially if said flower girl/ring bearer is their own child.  This is a look of pride ‘that’s my kid’ normally the child is nervous and a little shy, but once they see their dad at the end of the aisle all that disappears and they break out in a smile.

Look 2 – This is the look exchanged between the bridesmaid and the groom.  Normally its a full on smile because she knows how fantastic the bride looks and knows how nervous the groom is and wants to reassure him ‘it’s going to be ok, and just wait till you see her.

Look 3 – The father/mother of the bride as they escort the bride down the aisle.  This look is pure joy, they are so proud to be able to escort her to her awaiting groom, sometimes a little sadness (their little girl is growing up) but normally big smiles.

Look 4 – That magical moment when the groom sees his bride walking towards him, sometimes there are tears, but in all the weddings I’ve been part of there has been a huge smile, a ‘she looks stunning, I can’t believe she’s marrying me’ type of look.  Its magic and one of the best parts of the ceremony.

Look 5 – When the couple are finally standing in front of each other at the altar, shes given her flowers to her bridesmaid, the music has faded down, they are holding hands and we’re ready to start.  When they get to look each other in the eye and know that their lives are about to change forever.  Usually it’s a giant smile, a little trepidation, and sometimes the giggles come out.

A&J-281ablog
Amber and Jeff pic by lisa reid photography

Look 6 – One of my favourite parts of my job is to witness the little things that make a couple, a couple. I usually suggest a couple hold hands during their ceremony. Some don’t but most do. And I think those that do love that feeling of contentment they get when they hold the others hand, almost a “OK I can do this now!” it seems to help with the nerves. I love it when I look down at them holding hands and one of them in gently stroking the others hands with their thumbs, it’s such an intimate and loving action to perform to re-assure the other “don’t be nervous, it’s just me you’re talking to”

Look 7 – During the ceremony I suggest to the parents that they sit on the opposite side to their child, that way they get to look at their own child’s face during the ceremony.  When I am performing a ceremony I look into the faces of the guests and I always see a look of pride and absolute love on the parents faces as they witness their child getting married.

M&E-Wedding_7376-bbritwk-2smatte-re
Emma and Malcolm Pic by Wedding by Melt photography

Look 8 – This is not always a look but more of a conversation, after I pronounce a couple married and they share their first kiss, we then step to the side and sign the marriage licence, this is normally the first time a couple have had a chance to speak privately to each other on the day, and usually it’s a ‘you look stunning/beautiful/pretty’ type of conversation.  It’s always lovely to see a couple standing together, arms wrapped around each other, normally a bit relieved because the ceremony is out of the way and they can now get to the party section of the day, just enjoying the fact that they are surrrounded by their favourite people on such a magical day.

These looks are the kind of things that absolutely make me love my job.  The fact that I get to witness these types of looks, emotions, love, tears, declarations and laughter and see couples who are pledging to love and care for each other all their days, it absolutely makes my heart sing.

What does a celebrant do?

Published on by angelaportLeave a comment

All you need is love … and a good celebrant!

Being a celebrant is, in my eyes the best job ever! I get to meet many different couples, each wedding is different, just like each couple is different, and it is my job to make each ceremony a reflection of their love story and their personalities.

My journey with a couple usually begins when they contact me, to ask if I am available for their planned wedding date. These enquiries come either by email, my Facebook page or by phone, from that first contact I will check whether I am free on their wedding day, and then organise a time to visit with the couple, usually at their own home (I know how hard it can be for couples, especially with small children, to find time to meet with wedding vendors). Almost every time I  visit a couple for the first time, they always say:

“We haven’t done this before and have no idea where to start”

which is where I come in, kinda like ‘Super woman’ It’s my job to help a couple make their wedding ceremony perfect.  I know the legal bits we have to do, and I have tons of information about what else we can include to suit a couple, e.g, info about including children, remembrance pieces, unity ceremonies, readings.

My first visit with a couple is non-obligational, which means that it’s just a informal chat about what they have planned and what I offer, it gives us all a chance to suss each other out and decide if we are all on the same wavelength. I always take copies of two different ceremonies I have written, a job description (so nearly-weds know what my role entails) and all my contact details. I tell couples at that meeting that I will message them the next day to make sure they still want to book me.  It’s a bit unfair/awkward to expect couples to make a call when I’m sitting across the table from them, and they haven’t had a chance to chat in private about how awesome I am!

After they go ahead and confirm they want to book me, I book them in for their wedding date, and send them an invoice for my services. I require a deposit to be paid within 7 days of agreeing to use me as their celebrant, and I give information on how to pay the deposit.  I  then let  them know that  I will be in contact about 2-3 months out from the wedding date to start the next step of writing their wedding ceremony. In the mean time they are to think about anything they want to include in the ceremony/vows.  I tell couples to make notes of anything they see, read, hear that they like, and we can use that info to craft their ceremony.  I also recommend pinterest and  offbeat bride website.  I like to keep an open dialogue with a couple leading up to the wedding, so encourage them to contact me if they have any questions about the wedding ceremony or the wedding day.  Because I have contacts in the wedding industry I can offer information or recommendations for other wedding vendors.

A week out from the next scheduled meeting I will email them some homework, it is a list of questions which I ask, which gives me a better understanding of their personalities and how their relationship works, it’s very interesting what the answers reveal. The more information I gather from these homework questions and the subsequent meeting, the better the wedding ceremony.

From that meeting, and armed with all the ammunition I can get from the meetings, I sit down and write a draft ceremony for the couple.  I pride myself on making a ceremony as personal as we can get it.  When that is completed I email it to the couple to have a look at, making sure they are aware that we can absolutely change anything they don’t like.  We play around with the ceremony until it is completely perfect, then it goes into the folder to wait until the wedding day.

I give a couple information on obtaining their marriage licence (an absolute necessity for the ceremony to actually be legal) and will continue to ‘nag’ them until they contact me to tell me they have it. When they finally get it from the courts, I tell them to let me know and I will come and collect it from them, that way they have no chance of losing it before the big day, and it goes into the folder with the ceremony until the big day.

Then it’s time for the couple to work on writing their wedding vows (if they are choosing to write them themselves) I contact them regularly to ensure they are on track, and to see if they need any help with writing their vows.  I know they can be tricky, and some people are vowely-challenged.

Once I receive the vows, I print them out onto a personalised nice piece of card, (and I have the vows the wedding day, so no chance of a bride and/or groom forgetting them on the day) I put everything together, so it is ready for the rehearsal. At the scheduled rehearsal  we go over the logistics of the ceremony, who’s going to stand where, what’s going to happen when, music (I create a personalised playlist for each couple on Spotify) and have this on my cellphone which plugs into my PA system and the music and microphone runs through this.  It’s one less thing for a couple to think about on their wedding day.

I arrive at the wedding ceremony at least 45 minutes early, to ensure everything is set up, to calm the groom, and to chat with the guests.  Then its ceremony time, the fun part. I guide the couple and guests through the wedding ceremony, make sure the legalities (sign the paperwork) are all taken care of. Congratulate the couple after the ceremony, take a #celebrantselfie and then quietly leave the couple and their guests to enjoy the rest of the day.

I always provide couples with a package on their wedding day, in it is a copy of their ceremony (it can be hard for a couple to remember what was said on their wedding day, because of all the emotion going on, so it’s nice to have a copy to look back on), the package also includes the couple’s vows cards as a momento  of the day, their marriage licence, and a little feedback form.

I follow up with the couple the next day, via email, to ensure they had a great day, and don’t have any questions, and post away the paperwork.

I love what I do and are always blown away that I get to do this as a job, and I take what I do absolutely seriously, but that doesn’t mean we can have a little fun with it.  I am always honoured to be a part of a couples wedding day, it’s definitely a privilege.